After spending the last few months freezing my ass off in Korea, there is nothing better than spending a couple weeks on beautiful beaches under the hot sun. It was a great vacation. The food is great, the locals are friendly, and the land and sea is beautiful.
I got to go SCUBA diving, snorkeling, kayaking, hiking, sleeping, swim with a whale shark, party, eat, drive a scooter, pet some tigers, ride an elephant, and meet people from around the world.
They call Las Vegas “Sin City”… It’s child’s play compared to Thailand. You can get anything and everything in Thailand for a price. It is the playground of Europe. I hadn’t seen that many Westerners in 6 months!
People come to Thailand to use the land and it’s people for their own entertainment. At the same time, the Thai people use these rich foreigners to make some bahts! (Thai currency)
A typical day for a tourist in Thailand starts with getting lubed up and rubbed down by a Thai message therapist. This is followed by eating so much Thai food you could throw up… It’s so delicious! After one has recuperated from the food coma, they roll out of their hammock to spend hours shopping for pointless crap that they will probably throw away within a month.
Next comes drinking buckets of alcohol at one of the many bars and clubs through out the country and making a fool of yourself by being a drunken gluten. You literally buy 64 oz buckets! My favorite was a bucket of Red Bull and Vodka. I’m surprised there’s not more heart attacks.
The locals are more than willing to help you find ways to spend your money on whatever you want. They all know English, and are very good at bargaining your money away.
You have to watch out! They will try to take you on a taxi ride to nowhere and drop you off at shops with over priced trinkets. The taxi drivers get commissions on every tourist they get to go to these stores.
You can literally buy whatever you want. This includes the Thai people! Cameron and I were walking around one of the islands and found three full blocks of brothels. The girls come up to you, grab your God given jewels and ask you to take them with you for 1,000 baht. That’s about $30.
All over the tourist spots, you see old men with young Thai girls. They buy them to do whatever they desire at $30 for the next 24 hours. I guess if you need a tour guide, it’s a good deal! These tour guides show you more than the temples though…
As you might know, Thailand is filled with lady boys. They are men that want to be women, or have actually done the surgery to be changed into a woman. I found out through a great conversation with one of the locals that this is done with great sacrifice. Lady boys have a hard time finding work. People don’t want to hire them for fear that the tourists will be uncomfortable around them. Many men just naturally feel that they were born a woman in a man’s body. Hard to understand, but to each his/her own!
You have to watch out! Don’t let your wallet get stolen while getting a sneak attack hug by a hooker. If you find yourself attracted to a local, you might be surprised later to find out it’s a man as well.
While we were there, I heard of many stories of things getting stolen from the tourists…
Check out time was 10:30 a.m. at one of the hotels. I came running back to my hotel room and arrived at 10:40 to be surprised to see someone holding my passport and wallet. Cameron had gotten all of the luggage out of the room, but he didn’t see the wallet hiding in the bed sheets. They kindly handed it to me. Later on I counted the money and found that 5,000 baht was missing. That’s the equivalent of $75. I couldn’t argue, it would be their word against mine… I think of it as a donation to the poor of Thailand.
One of our friends’ camera was stolen as well… The worst story came from a Thai women. She is married to a French guy. When I saw her, I noticed that she was very upset. She explained that the night before, the mafia had taken her and locked her in a public bathroom. They wouldn’t let her out till her husband could get 20,000 baht out of the ATM. It’s not just tourists that have to worry for their safety.
Can you really blame them?? Every day the Thais see people come to use them and act like idiots. Spending 10 times more money in a day than they can earn from work. The tourist mistreat them and show off their wealth. If one has a chance to take a little piece of the wealth that they flaunt, why not.
I went on a date with Ms. Bikini Koh Samui 2007!! She was very nice to me. She showed me around the island and we spent the night talking about our different cultures and what it’s really like for the locals. She gave me a different perspective of the land. She works 11 hours a day, 6 days a week. She lives next to a beautiful beach, but only goes to the beach maybe three times a year. I just happened to meet her on her day off from work! She works in a hair salon. Through conversations like these while traveling, it really makes you appreciate what we have in our Western world.
If you’re looking for a great place to get away and relax, Thailand’s the place. It has something for everyone. Don’t be scared of the stories of violence and crime. Be smart and you’ll be completely fine. If you’re looking to find culture and a truly different society, go to Laos, Vietnam, or Cambodia as well. There are a lot of tourists in Thailand, and it’s making the Thai culture slowly deteriorate. Over all, it was a damn good time!
This girl had bug larva, grass hoppers, and beetles in a bag. I tried them all. Not bad. Very crunchy!
